The Saga of the $20

The saga began during the wedding rehearsal on Friday night, when one of the groomsmen offered to take the guys in the wedding party out for breakfast on Saturday morning. When everyone agreed it was a good idea, they arranged to meet for breakfast at a local cafe on Saturday morning. You have to understand that we were way up in the thumb of Michigan, in a small town called Cass City. The gentleman with whom we were staying described the local cafe as a "men-only fishing shack," if that gives you any mental picture.

Jason was grinning when he told me later that morning that, much to the groomsmen's chagrin, the men-only fishing shack did not accept credit cards. Jason was the only one of the party with cash in his pocket, as he'd had the foresight to stop on the way out of town to get cash from the ATM for tolls, meals and any other potential emergencies (such as being stuck at the local cafe without any way to pay for breakfast). Breakfast became Jason's treat.

The story didn't become interesting until the next day, when we were leaving western NY. We'd spent the bulk of what little cash we had left paying for tolls on the way to NY but knew we didn't have enough left for tolls on the way home. We bought gas at Smokin' Joe's (good ol' Smokin' Joe) for $.15/gallon less than anywhere else. But Jason was not about to pay $1.50 to use the ATM at Smokin' Joe's, so he waited and pulled in to the next drive-through ATM he saw. As the receipt printed out, and he realized that he'd paid $2.00 to use that ATM, he started grinding his teeth. That was nothing compared to how he felt when all he got from the ATM was a receipt--NO CASH. The machine never did give us any cash.

We called the 800# on the front of the machine, but the person who answered that call was only there to address security issues. (I suppose he would have been helpful if we had seen terrorists blowing up the ATM.) But he gave us another toll-free number to call for customer service. To add insult to injury, the number Jason called was for a dating service. First they stole his $20, then they tried to hook him up with someone else--with his wife sitting right next to him! Huffing, he pulled into a spot in the parking lot (the drive-through ATM was in the parking lot of a Tops grocery store) and went into the store to find someone with whom to talk. Of course, nobody could help him. So he bought some snacks, asked for extra cash back, and left the store shaking his head that he hadn't thought of that option to begin with and saved himself the $2 transaction fee!

This afternoon I found a customer service # on the bank's website and called them to find out what they would do about giving our $22 back. The lady's first (rather unhelpful) suggestion was that I go back to the grocery store to talk to someone in the grocery store. "Just because it said M&T Bank on the ATM didn't mean that they were responsible for the machine." !!! Then she put me on hold and came back to tell me that I needed to go to my own back to fill out an ATM dispute form. It took me over an hour at my bank to fill out the form to get my stinkin' $22 back, and it will take up to 30 days to process the form!

P.S. If you're ever driving from MI to NY across Canada, do not forget your children's birth certificates. Such forgetfulness provides the border guards with all kinds of opportunities to practice their tactics for deterring terrorists from entering the country.